A couple of weeks ago, I reported on the latest offering for visitors to Alton Towers which resulted in the team from Play and Stay being invited up to the resort for a day of fun and laughter (for free, of course). My co-worker and understudy, Jonathan “Big D” Dudley, has just posted his review of the DVD on our blog for you all to read. I, however, am going to report on the events that unfolded on that fateful day, September 2, 2008.

It all began at 4:00 in the morning when my alarm went off, thus telling me it was time to get up out of my bed. Whilst the darkness and beating rain outside was trying to stop me from leaving said bed, the thought of going to Alton Towers for the day won over.
Armed with a cup of hot tea, the company’s Ford Galaxy and free entry to the park, I set off on my travels to pick up the rest of the team.
By 5:00 am, everyone was onboard and almost awake, so we headed for the M20 and the lovely prospect of a four hour drive to the Midlands.
After a long drive (made ever so much longer by Nathan’s request to listen to the Today Show on Radio 4), we arrived at Alton with no McMuffins in our bellies. It would appear that the M1 is no place for McDonalds.

The first ride we went on was Spinball Whizzer. Although when I say “we”, I actually mean “everyone except me.” I am indeed a chicken and have a real fear of theme park rides. (See entry entitled Family Fun at LEGOLAND Windsor for a little history.) The rest of the team seemed to thoroughly enjoy the ride and Jonathan realised at this point that he really shouldn’t have bothered straightening his hair this morning.
From there, we headed over to X Sector. Of course, there was absolutely no chance I was going on anything here - I was content to take pictures of everything around me. Oblivion did get rave reviews from all who braved it whereas the general consensus of Enterprise was “AAAAARRRGHHHHHH I’m going to fall out!!!!!”
I was allowed to escape a few rides without getting too much stick and I unfortunately used my quota in this section alone. It’s ok, Hex was next. Any of you who have previously ridden Hex will probably agree that this is one confusing ride. After watching a few films on TVs dotted around the various dark rooms and corridors, we were all led into a chamber with two rows of seats facing each other, separated by a cursed branch in the middle. What happened next just didn’t add up. It felt like we were spun all the way around, yet my camera never left my lap. Anyone got any ideas what actually happens in there? Answers on a postcard please…

Next up was UG Land; home of Rita and Corkscrew. I chickened out of Rita to much ripping from my comrades and opted to test my wits against the Corkscrew instead. Quite why, I’m not sure. Rita is new, doesn’t involve any massive drops or loops and is relatively safe. Corkscrew on the other hand is old, rickety, and downright horrible. I was stupid enough to sit on the wrong side and felt like I was about to smack my head on the uprights every five seconds. If nothing else, Corkscrew did get the nerves out of me and enabled me to actually start enjoying the rest of the park.

After a leisurely stroll through the Gardens, we ended up in the Forbidden Valley. I had heard that Air was pretty tame, so I was well up for ride. Some unfortunate soul didn’t agree though and chundered at the end of the ride, just before we were allowed off. Air is definitely exhilarating and thoroughly enjoyable. The best part of the ride is easily when you rotate round so that you are facing the sky. I actually wanted to go again, but our priority passes were only good for one turn each.

Next up was Nemesis, the ride I had waited all day for. When I went to Thorpe Park last year, it was easily the best ride there, and this one was supposed to be even faster. After a short wait and an obnoxious employee who didn’t really want to give us priority, we made it on. And WOW, what a ride. Nemesis is still the best around. I’m hoping that one day, when all my hard work as a copywriter pays off, I might actually be able to open my own theme park full of various Nemesis rides. Or even just one really long one that lasts about 10 minutes. Or maybe even both.

Onwards and upwards, we headed round to the the delights of Duel where the ever smug understudy got a high score, almost doubling my own effort. If the Zombie Holocaust that is (apparently) only a matter of years away actually happens, Jonathan is so on my team.
The last ride of the day was the Runaway Mine Train. This is my chance to shine and actually remove my hands from the safety bar for more than one second. The crew operating the ride were great. Ever smiling and chatty, I honestly believe they made the ride what it is.

With Priority Ride Passes in your hand, two things happen:
1) You feel extremely important when you stroll to the front of the queue and
2) You get through the park in a very short amount of time.
Both factors are great and made the day that much better. We started at 11.30 and finished just before 17:00 but then we did miss out all the water rides and the extremely inviting Squirrel Nutty Ride. All that was left to do was go back, grab a shower, and then head down to the bar to discuss the day’s events.

We were staying at the Alton Towers Hotel which was absolutely amazing and the perfect end to the day. It is only moments away from the park via monorail and comes complete with a bar, a restaurant and Stacey the singer. Splash Landings was also great, but the entertainment was a little too young for my liking. This is where the real difference comes in to play: Alton Towers Hotel is the better choice for couples and families with older children whilst Splash Landings is definitely more for the kids.
The only thing left to say is that the buffet breakfast rocked and that apparently, I am eight years younger at Alton Towers. Thanks Giovanna.
For more great pictures of our day at Alton Towers, check out Play and Stay on Facebook.
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